Why do I take selfies?
Ever since Sonu was born in the year 1999, I recall happily snapping countless pictures of my baby girl. I wanted to capture every moment when she did something new or wore something new. I somehow made sure that I never appeared in the pictures, afraid that I might not be a pleasant addition to her cute and adorable poses. I rarely had any pictures taken with my precious bundle of joy. I paid more attention to ensure that each album was carefully themed and that even the paper I chose to write little poems on had to match her outfit in the pictures.
Recently, it hit me that perhaps what I did may not have been fair to Sonu. Someday when I am no longer physically present in her life, she may want to look at pictures of us together or pictures of me; how her mum looked like as she aged through the years. From the time I was expecting her to the time I bid adieu.
I feel the same regret as I search for pictures of my mum and me. Rarely any were taken though we had shared an extremely close and strong bond. When I speak of her fondly to Sonu, it hurts that I do not have enough pictures to show Sonu what a beautiful person her grandma was. Similarly, I feel the same way towards my angel Preeti. I feel that I should have captured more of all the beautiful moments Preeti, Sonu and I had shared together.
Thus the selfies I take are for Sonu to smile at, laugh at and frown at knowing that her mum sometimes knew just how to cheer her up or simply annoy her. And she would not have to search for those pictures like I do now.
Love ~ Narin Grewal